Is Your Husband a Modern Dad? Here are 6 Signs To Tell If He’s One

Forget about the guy who came home from work, patted the kids on the head, fell into the sofa and reached for the game or smartphone or tablet.

The modern dad has himself invested more into the role. He is a partner who can take over the reins when mummy needs an hour (or even a day) of rest. He understands the joy of witnessing his little one stand for the first time. He is a confidant who doesn’t judge when his stay-at-home wife says she’s tired.

In Fact, More Dads Stay at Home Now while Mummies Work…

For some, they “sacrifice” even their careers for time with their little ones. According to the Manpower Ministry’s Report on Labour Force in 2015, over 10,000 male Singaporeans and permanent residents cited “family responsibilities” such as childcare, care-giving to family members and housework as the main reason for not working.

This was more than triple the number in 2006, when about 3,000 men said they stayed home for the same reasons.

This new species is breaking social norms that were established generations ago. He is redefining his place in homes and play grounds, an area that has traditionally been dominated by mums and he’s loving it.

So does your partner belong to this new species? Here are 6 signs to help you tell if he’s a modern daddy. Do tick them off as you go!

1. He was at the entire birth, watching it live.

Pacing around the waiting room or at work? That’s how things used to be. But now, modern dad will be by your side to witness it – he stroked your face and mirrored your groans, he watched a child hatch from your vagina without making a childish quip. He might even help cut the umbilical cord of the baby and take photos for you!

2. He can handle a cranky baby all by himself.

As mummies all know that one-on-one time with kids is really invaluable. But if the daddy were to have his hands full with a hungry baby or a couple of tired, cranky toddlers all on his own, can he handle it? Well, modern dads do. It isn’t always smooth sailing but he will make the best out of it, without calling you for help.

3. He gets sleepless nights just like you.

Those wake-ups during the wee hours were the worst. The constant crying, the inability to soothe the baby back to sleep, struggling to button the pajamas all while the baby was wailing. Then came the feeding and burping… Remember those days? Well, modern dads now shoulder half of that burden. He’ll help change diapers while you breastfeed, and then take turns to sooth the baby.

4. He listens to the child.

A modern daddy listens to his kids when they talk to him. He doesn’t tune them out when he gets home from work or whatever. Though he knows that much of what they say in the early years of speaking is just talking for the sake of talking, but the dad will listen and try and understand the great stuff about their kids. What really matter is the bonds built through those interactions.

5. He is willing to give up his recreational activities.

He gives up practically all forms of recreational activities just to rush home to his kids. He wants to spend more time with them by bathing them, helping them put their toys away and getting them dressed. He doesn’t want to miss their milestones and wish to learn more about their little ones.

6. He expresses his love openly.

He understands that regardless how introverted or unemotional he might be in his daily life, there is no excuse for being that way with his own children. Kids want to be hugged and kissed and tickled and they want to do the same back to their daddy. The modern dad understands that by expressing his love openly, it will make his son’s or daughter’s life way better.

It’s nice to see fathers who are active in parenting, like they should be. They now understand the struggles of seeking that perfect balance between raising a child and building a career. This may be the case for fathers of the past generations too, just as loving as the ones we now see. But unfortunately, gender stereotypes discouraged them from being so involved in the lives of their kids.

As we usher in the Father’s Day weekend, we celebrate how fathers are now embracing their roles in raising children! Give them a pat on the shoulder for getting their hands (and arms and shirts and jeans) dirty. It’s surely making a huge difference!